I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Randomize
