garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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