How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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