Sober January is a disaster.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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