Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
