We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
