I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
