just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"