so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
