I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
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He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
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My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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