It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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