I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize