its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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