so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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