You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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