am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
