Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
