I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
