Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize