Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(760): View more from California

You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..

Fav 11 1263 4453
share tweet
(304): View more from West Virginia

You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up

Fav 35 7961 1525
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(203): View more from Connecticut

Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.

Fav 26 1258 3267
share tweet
(541): View more from Oregon

definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass

Fav 6 1790 975
share tweet
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(302): View more from Delaware

Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.

Fav 9 2579 1030
share tweet
(216): View more from Ohio

Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight

(440): View more from Ohio

Challenge Accepted

Fav 11 2762 989
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(618): View more from Illinois

College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.

(1-618): View more from Illinois

This is true but you can't really get fired from college

Fav 3 1589 782
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(615): View more from Tennessee

Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.

Fav 1 414 149
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(410): View more from Maryland

Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.

Fav 3 27 39
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT