Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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