So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
