Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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