I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
BRING THE BAGELS
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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