singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize