where am i from again
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
