Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
