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you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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