Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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