How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize