That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
