im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Randomize
