i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
