So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Randomize