those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize