I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I have fence marks all over my body
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
