dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I don't think brook has ever known best
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
