There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Be still, my beating vagina.
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Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
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We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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