Please don't use social media to get back at me.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
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tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
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And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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