I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
