i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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