You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize