last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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