You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
