Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Blood and glitter go together right?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
