I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
