At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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