so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
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