I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
