I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
