I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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