I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
